Bathing is an ART? Certainlike is be da epitome of kittykatz fine artabilities. Well, jes one of manies.
Today we will reveal the secrets of dis fine arts as only the King of Kitties, da Tuxedo Dude, Rowdy, can shows dem. Sorries, I no means to shouts dere. Dis keyboard not be so friendlies wif the kittykat paws when we tries to take da load offen da Large One while he restin up from all da outside doins an tings him been into. I tries to does better from now ons! Hones kittykat!
To starts wif, I toght you could likes to sees my handsome self,
who by the bys, is the model for the demonstration we doin
for todays posty blog blather thingie.
Dis de latest Handsome Pikture of me, Rowdy York
da baby kitten of da 6 Mouskateers of Five Oaks Manor,
(ain't dat a mouffulls)
Firs and mos imprtanlikes we has to wet da paw
Now, da paw is da second mos imprtant items we has to utalizes
when we wash the fantabulous body of da KittyKats.
O'corse da mos important one is da tongue.
Gots to has a good large, long, rough, soggyfied tongue
Doesn't forgets dat.
We will begins wif da fase an da hearin ears
Dey de mos important to da good looks of da KittyKats
Dons forget to get behind dem ears Bubba!
Makes sure you gets the bug juice outtin da insides too.
All dat runnin catchin dem bugs with dem big ole ears makes so messyfied.
No one Bean laks unwashed behind da ears kitties in deir arms.
A breaks alongs da way don hurts nobodies
Jus makes sure de is nobodies around to sees dis.
We KittyKats no wants our record of hard working washin
to be dashed and badmoufed bout us takin breaks.
We no take breaks, we taks Cat Naps wif da Beans.
(gots to has our Beans for to use as pillers, 'K)
Oh! We was givin lesson here, Sorre! I forgets
Bad habit I picks up from bein round da Large One
when da Small One wans hims to make somptin done on
sometin himself calls da Honeys DoList, or sometin lak dat.
Now, makes sure you cleans da leg and da paws
of all da mess an stuffs ya gets offn daself.
Any place be a good place to double checks for da posibililities of
dem Dastardly Lil Dudes da Beans calls fleas and dem oters called Tix
Dey de tings what gets us soakefied with dat evil smellin stuff
what 'sposed is to kill said bugggs. *Ickky*
I druther I washes a few extras minuteses dan has dat stuff on me
Doesn't forgets da tail end and o course da TAIL!
I know it hard to catch, dat tail, but it gets in lots of icky tings
Just tink of where yo done dragged yours da last time you wuz,
say, in da litters box even
Nuf said bout day, HUH?
Now, is looking good dat tail. I kninda is proud of it
Jus wish da Bean would not use it for a handle when I tries
my super swoof getaway dash to freedom when
he wans to get me outta somethin I ain sposed to be inta!
I mean, after all, a KittyKat has to has SOME dignities 'K?
An da tail IS our rudder type helpy ting when me mades da trip
round da house liketysplits like.
Las ting on da Bath Before a Nap set of instrucktions is dis.
When da bath be trough, a KittyKat mus choose
A nice clean dignefided place to draps da handsom selfs
to TAKES das naps we work so hards to gets ready fur.
Myself likes da open window, with da big donut tingy
da Small One done made a dozen of for ussns.
Dis look lak a good spot.
An I gots myself turned backsided to da Large One
and dat daddrattedcursefied Blinky Box.
Now I is comfy, I see yo afters ...... ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
With such as this around the house, I DO feel loved.
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